Queen Among Men: Mother’s Raising Boys
I never thought that in a million years I would have two children. Sure, he wanted children, but specifically he wanted a girl and a boy. So having to change my mind after level two ultrasound indicated that I was going to have another child was quite difficult for me.
Now that you are here, life as you knew it will never be the same again. Instead of happy hour after work and all day shopping on Saturdays with my friends, I find that I spend most of my time at sporting events. Sure, I’m married, but that’s Part 2 of my ezine (stay tuned). I never have time for myself, I gained weight and generally felt like life had given me a bad hand. I found myself yelling at my kids and many times it wasn’t fun to be around. Then I realized, like the Tonka truck that my son crashed into my foot, enough is enough! I would no longer feel that life with children is challenging and unmanageable, I will take control and make the rest of your childhood the most amazing experience I can.
Therefore, I developed a list of Top 5 Impact Strategies: Keys to Raising Children
Impact Strategy 5: Love it right where it is. Although he is now a fool and reminds you of your obnoxious little brother, he enjoys the innocence of his youth. He’ll be doing teenage stuff before you know it.
Impact Strategy 4: He loves me, he doesn’t love me. Children tend to be closer to their mother when they are young. In adolescence (9-13) they form a bond with their father or other men in their life that seems unbreakable. Fear not, they always come back to mom. When the camera is on the MVP, who do you say hello to too? Mommy!
Impact Strategy 3: Stand Up for Your Child. You have to forever advocate for your child. The educational system tends to be less child-friendly in many cases, therefore, the educational needs of our children are not being met. Attend PTA meetings, meet your child’s teacher, and provide a variety of enrichment experiences for your child. The dropout rate is alarming in many communities, make sure your child is not just another statistic.
Impact Strategy 2: Teach him a sense of self-worth. We know that as women, when we look good, we feel good. The same goes for children. Although this is a difficult lesson for my children, they would rather leave the house each morning to go to school without a complete grooming. It has to be a boy thing not to wash your face or brush your teeth without being told (every day). When my boys wear classic clothes, they tend not to be so rude. They don’t automatically search for rain puddles right away, they usually make sense to stay clean for at least 45 minutes.
Another sense of self-worth is surrounding children with their extended families. My kids love the attention they get from the family’s great aunts and uncles. They love hearing funny childhood stories about their father and me, as they look over and over at the many family photos. The sense of community and family is often lacking in our society. Continue to enrich the lives of your children by becoming involved with members of the immediate and extended family.
Impact Strategy 1: Accept your child’s active level. Children tend to be active and everywhere all the time. They seem to learn best by doing an activity, an experiment, or some kind of simulation. Create an environment where children of all ages and stages can be active, move and be free to be creative. Teach them to read books of verse-centered fiction. They need kid-friendly instruction to keep them motivated and eager to try something new.
Finally, remember that children are a joy. They are the next generation of warriors who must be properly trained now to fight the incredible battle that lies ahead. We cannot take care of them, yes, protect them from harmful influences, but allow them experiences so that they learn to make good decisions. Yes, they will be bad along the way, but be there to love him through those bad decisions and teach him how to be receptive to constructive advice and instructions.