Human relationships are complex and beautiful. Although people and their behavior are unpredictable, they bring happiness most of the time in our life. We value memories with our people and they certainly make our lives worth living.
Our whole life, directly or indirectly, revolves around people from our birth to our last breath.
The human being is the greatest source and contributor of energy, learning, affection, inspiration, recreation and communication for all. That is why they are called “social beings”. Therefore, we can easily say that all our wants, needs, dreams and desires are fulfilled by the people around us. Thus, we study, play, joke, talk, eat, work, ride, enjoy, celebrate or go out with our friends, classmates, colleagues, acquaintances, cousins, relatives. These people could later become our teacher, mentor, guide, coach and philosopher at some point.
From time immemorial to this Millennium era, nothing has really changed when it comes to our social preferences. We constantly interact with people, so we spend a significant amount of time with them on a daily basis. And without a doubt, our “near and dear ones” are incredibly with us during our good times and bad. Also, let me be proud to say that we celebrate all festivals, joyful moments and birthday celebrations with enthusiasm with our lovely people. In short, your mere presence during a crisis situation gives us immense strength to face any difficult situation or recover from the worst health complications. Therefore, they motivate us to do our best even in the most stressful moments. It sounds funny, but it is true that even while we dream, most of the time we interact with our people.
If people were so important to all of us, why the hell do we condemn them or their behavior? Why do we hurt ourselves and hurt them too? Why do we ridicule them by calling these same people complex creatures with unpredictable behavior? Why do we curse or humiliate them?
To answer the above questions and according to my thought process, we should not generalize a behavior to conclude or form a perception from some unpleasant experiences, situations or interactions.
So what do we do? The best we can do is always analyze a situation through the “reality occurrence test” model. This test assesses a person and their character as well as gauge their credibility by reviewing their past history while interacting with you at some point in the past. Assuming that he has supported you more than fifty percent of the time in the past. This percentage implies that he is definitely a well-wisher and only a few times, he has not been able to support you. And this change in his behavior the last few times could be due to an uncontrolled circumstance on his part. This could also be due to your inability to do so due to your changing priorities or commitments. Therefore, this change could be a transitory phase and could be overcome soon.
A mature person, therefore, might sometimes ignore or forget behavior so recently that they take it personally and show resentment. The least you are expected to do is complain about that person or feel devastated by the change in behavior. To put it in perspective, give this person the benefit of the doubt once. And remember, we as human beings forget various things on many occasions.
Also, let’s discuss another problem seen in most relationships. Most of the time, as our relationship evolves, there is a huge load of expectations around it. As a result, this burden begins to bother our relationship, leading to numerous quarrels, misunderstandings, and bitter feelings.
A sensitive person should lower their expectations, as raising expectations could turn a beautiful relationship into an unnecessary problem. Also, keep in mind that reciprocity in any relationship is important, but you shouldn’t create roadblocks in a healthy relationship with mind-blowing expectations.
Some important lessons could be: empathizing with your near and dear ones and extending our support unconditionally can do wonders and sow the seeds of a platonic relationship. Another point in favor is not to react immediately and aggressively to hated arguments, nasty messages and sore points. Saving it for another time could prevent our relationships from being ruined forever.
Also, there could be times when you continue to be disturbed by the change in behavior of your loved ones or experience that their behavior has turned negative towards you. In this case, it would be preferable to speak frankly to the person in question than to keep it to yourself and wait for a later date in the future.
Be precise, transparent and courageous in communicating your feelings. Feel free to explain how his changing behavior is affecting you.
As a general rule, remove the scope of any negative feelings, traits, and emotions in a relationship. It is not advisable to be false, dishonest, hypocritical, distrustful, possessive, or jealous in a healthy relationship.
Respect and value all your relationships. They are an integral part of our life. At the same time, let’s also accept that relationships can go through life’s ups and downs. Every day, you need to invest your time and positive energy to make them evolve and succeed. Being honest always helps build a strong friendship.
Last but not least. Remember that relationships can become more generous, loving, interesting, and fulfilling as long as we value, respect, and work to nurture them. Lasting relationships need to be truly progressive instead of becoming regressive and stifling over time. I love my life and all the wonderful people who have made my life so beautiful. The relationships in my life have miraculously transformed my life and made it more deliverable.